Tired, in pain and very moody is how I have been living my life. Justifying all my actions in my own mind is how I got into this situation. My back hurt, can’t go to the gym, my knee hurts, can’t go the gym. I am stressed out so I need to eat in order to feel better. I didn’t care how I looked nor did I care how I felt. It was all justified in my head as getting older and it is what it is. It was always one excuse after another. I masked everything with my humor, the pain, depression, anxiety as well as the shortcomings I had in my life.
Everything was a joke, but was sad is the joke was my attitude toward me. The past couple years as I looked at my reflection and I have not seen me, it was like I was looking through a window at a stranger rather than a reflection in a mirror. This was not me; I could never be like this. Yet here I was.
What made it worse was the fact that I was coaching kids in sports, telling them to keep working, keep driving. Train, train train is what I was preaching but in my life it was excuse, excuse, excuse. This went on for about 2 years of self-realization and justifying my situation. My wife of many years has been doing CrossFit in Nashua for over three years and has always been trying to get me to join, she has been and always will be my biggest cheerleader. Come on we can work out together, you will like it and it will get you healthy. Yet, I always had some excuse not to do it and that was that.
Then one night we were sitting in the living room and she mentioned to me that she read that the Box is doing a fit for life, a transformation of someone to a healthy life. Without even thinking of it, I opened up my phone and began typing my email to them, explaining that I needed to get my life back… I needed to be me again. The only problem is that I did not have an email address to send it to, had to do a little research but we got it and off it went. I pour everything on the table in that email, secretly hoping that I could be picked and become me again. The next day I got an email from Eric inviting me to an interview in a few days, WOW this could really happen!!!!!!
Walking into the box I had no idea what to expect as I had never been inside. Oh sure I have been in the parking lot dropping off my son and niece but no way could I go inside!!!!! I would be embarrassed by all the fit people and then there was lumpy ol me. So to step through the doors was huge, and then going into a room with Eric and Sarah really made me nervous, would they judge me? Would they look at me and say he is a lost cause? So I made a choice right there.. I am going to lay it all on the line and that way I can say I gave it my all. You see, I had hope of getting picked but walking through the door for some reason, it all went away. There was no way I could be picked… not me, why me?
When the interview started, I sat across from Eric and Sarah and low and behold I could see in their eyes that they were not judging me by the way I looked. They listened as I babbled and babbled, remember I was laying it all on the line, about what I wanted and what I could do with this chance. I will be honest, I actually got a little emotional during the interview because the more I talked, the more my hopes went up and the more I wanted it. I could not believe it when I got an email inviting me to a workout with 4 other candidates and be evaluated.
Fastword to Sunday October 11th, standing in the box with 5 candidates, 4 trainers and a box member who has done what we are trying to accomplish. WoW talk about overwhelming and exciting all at once. All 5 of us went through the workout and I could see how hard everyone wanted it, working, sweating and reaching deep within to complete this workout.. all of us wanting it. What happened next really blows me away, that night I got an email from Eric and it said that they had decided to work with all 5 of us and change all of our lives, Is this true? Could this really be happening? I made it, and not only that the others made it!!! We now have more of a built-in support system of people going through what we are going through. So now, I say, it is time to take my life back and time to put the work it… So, let’s do this!
Mike is a participant in CrossFit Nashua's 2015/2016 "Fit-For-Life" program. Participants track their progress in the CrossFit training program during the coming 1-year period and log their progress in this blog. Best of luck Mike, in meeting your training goals!